Lift off or let down?

So why on earth am I actually considering living without a car? And what do I mean by the fact that that first 10 days carless days haven't’t gone too badly? Quite apart from the cancelled visits, I have had to walk to school each day (only 10-15 minutes but about three in the car and I find getting up in the morning a bit of a challenge) and we have only just made it. I have had to let down two friends, one of whom needed a lift (to a place that I too wanted to visit) and the other of whom needed something picked up from a nearby town. I have had to wait for late buses and struggle back with heavy shopping, dash from bus stop to school and then there was the problem of Tuesday evening.

Tuesday evenings are a logistical challenge even with a car, involving getting home from work in time to take eldest son to a drama class (“why are you late Mum, you’re always late”…”Sorry, darling, traffic!” picking him up again at 8pm, dropping him home to babysit the younger two while husband and I go to our drama class at 8.15pm, and in between that I have to drop off the babysitter who  has  picked up the youngest one from school and stayed until I am home.  Without a car that seemed well-nigh impossible.

It wasn’t quite impossible, thanks to the drama teacher herself who drove us around, and the babysitter’s own home being within walking distance of ours. The thing is, we have had to rely on other people to help and that isn’t ideal. You can ask favours of other people for a short while but when does this become using them? And what about their own busy lives? Shouldn’t we stand on our own two feet, or drive on our own four wheels?

Perhaps at this stage I should introduce the family. We are a middle class, middle income family with three children living in a semi-detached house on the cheaper, north, side of an all-too-expensive town. We have a by-pass that cuts through the town in a rather bizarre manner. The south side of the by-pass has, on the whole, but not exclusively, more des-reses, but where we are is very pleasant. It’s just not near that many shops. We have a small ‘Express’ version of a supermarket chain, which sells most of what is needed but is certainly more expensive than its larger cousins. There are two corner shops, one better stocked than the other, a newsagents, a pharmacy, a pizza take- away place and a dog grooming parlour. We also have a vet, so dog owners at least can take care of their pooches inside and out. There are enough schools to cater for everyone unless you are very particular in which case you’d better move south of the by-pass and pay a bit, er lot, more.

We have three children at these local schools - two (Teenage Ted and Lexy) at secondary and one (Coco the Bear) at primary. (They have chosen these blog names themselves). The schools are within walking distance, (“Please drive me, I am tired/have got a lot to carry/will get wet/have a bone in my leg…”). My husband, E, commutes to London using bus, train and tube. The timetables tie in with each other at certain times of day. Outside these hours he has a 30 minute walk to/from the local train station (“Can you give me a lift, please?”). I work a couple of days a week in the local town - about two miles to my office - and the rest I spend at home doing all the normal housewifery type things like picking up after the children, cleaning, shopping, and, in theory, writing my best seller.  I’m also part of a growing community movement which is forming links between disparate groups and, as a clearly vital part of this, I spend much of Thursday having coffee and cake at a local church.

At a recent meeting to discuss these links it was suggested that we form a type of LETS group  (Local Exchange Trading Scheme) whereby local people exchange goods and services without needing money. The plan - as yet unfulfilled - has been to write down a list of what we could offer and what we would like to have. I had planned to offer lifts, deliveries and pick-ups using my huge green vehicle. In return, I hoped to find someone who could do some DIY and FINALLY put the bedroom door back on (we took it off and removed crucial pieces of wood around it when two kittens went missing somewhere beneath the floorboards, but that is another story with a happy ending - though not for the woodwork). Without a car I can’t do that. 

In fact, having a car has been important to my part in the local community. I have seen myself as a lift-giver. Now I can’t be and am turning into a lift-beggar. 

This is a curious development. I don’t like it. Being the person who could give lifts was something that defined me. Then again, it was something I was getting tired of, but I could never bring myself to say no, not even to Teenage Ted. Well I would say “I’m never giving you a lift to school again, do you hear me, you ungrateful little…” or some other sweet sentiments, but guess what, good parent that I am, I never stuck to my word. Now I can’t give any lifts! Yipee!

My legs ache with all the walking to and from Coco the Bear’s school though.